Age is an issue of mind over matter.  If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.  ~ Mark Twain

Yesterday (October 24) was my twenty tooot (figure it out yourself) birthday. I know I’m “getting” older but I don’t really feel getting older — mentally, emotionally or physically (sigh). I can still play physical sports you know, although I may need to get myself some practice and exercise first to beat exhaustion and hard breathing. I have matured greatly in a lot of ways, but believe me when I say that I’m still the same person I was in college days (did I see eyebrows raising?). How fast time flies. The next thing I know, I’m already a husband, a father, a grandpa, an oldie and god knows what else? The only comfort I get in knowing this truth is that each and every one of us is going to be like that. Sooner or later, everybody will have to cross that road called geezerhood. ^_^
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My opinions in religion, culture and even politics some years ago were very different from today. At present, there’s no way I can all fuse them into a single unified belief without contradicting itself. I can say that what my views yesterday are almost, if not totally, opposite of my views today. Say for example, my thought about homosexuality. Before, when people asked me if I viewed homosexuality and sex change as “bad,” I would, without a blink of an eye, say “yes!” and would go on explaining how God made just two sexes and anything else outside this are unacceptable, nasty and immoral. Lately have I just realized that homosexuality has nothing to do with immorality. What is really nasty about becoming your true self?

The cause of homosexuality---which some described as a trait, disease, behavior, desire, mental illness, perversion, political identity, lifestyle and even sin---is still undetermined. My sister and a cousin, who were both psychology graduates, said that there have been no proven tests stating that this abnormality stems from psychological or biological problems.

Many believe that gender is hard-wired in the brain before birth. Most homosexuals said that they have been bakla and tomboy since the beginning, ‘trapped’ in men’s or women’s bodies, so they claim. Our gender is, according to them, can be more determined by our brains and not by our bodies. Most of them argue that because mental gender cannot be changed via psychiatric means, the only alternative left is to change the physical body to match the mind.

It must be depressing for a guy who had just undergone sex change operation to become a woman when “his” petition to change his name and gender was denied by the Supreme Court of the Philippines. It’s not that the SC was glued to conservatism; there aren’t enough laws recognizing sex change, and the gender of somebody registered at birth — derived from physical body — is still immutable. Unless, some new legislation about sex change are passed, which I highly doubt, people who have gone sex transplant may not get their desired gender.

As expected, some conservative people would rebuke this as a work of evil. But is there more evil than cutting the thin hope of people who only wish for completeness and happiness? What injury will it cause conservative people when a homosexual corrects what s/he believes is wrong with his/her body? How many more of them does God have to create in order for these conservative people to realize that He actually wants them here?
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It was sudden and unexpected. None of us were prepared for it. But then, all things shall inevitably come to an end. That’s precisely what happened to Duday, our dog, our pet who had been with us for years. She succumbed to a mysterious illness we don’t know where she contracted from. She was 9 years old.

Some often view the death of a pet to be of no consequence or importance — particularly by those who are no pet lovers. Honestly speaking, I’m not much of a pet lover myself and most of the time I only attend to our dogs when I feel like it. In fact, I even play pranks on them on some occasions. But when I received the news last Tuesday evening after coming home from work, I was shocked and felt weak. Tatay said that Duday had waited for him before she passed away. It was sad. Duday had become an integral part of our lives. We valued her as a companion, a trusted ally and an intelligent pet. She was like, as one may say, a family member.

We buried her at our yard on that very night. We dig a decent hole two feet beneath the ground for her tomb, taking us almost two hours before we got the depth. It was tiring, but for a family’s pet who died, its the least and the very last sacrifice you could do.

Goodbye, Duday. Thanks for the memories. We’ll miss you...
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Tuesday, October 16, 2007 at Tuesday, October 16, 2007 | 5 comments
I can’t remember the last time I really listened to FM radio. So when I tried tuning in to an FM station that plays both contemporary and old-school songs last Sunday evening, it was so relaxing. It wasn't long, however, before something snapped inside me. How’s our local radio today? They were very popular in the 90s, when personal computer was not yet a household name as it is nowadays. I'm part of those generation of people who could list down the names of each FM station, from those that were disliked to those that were preferred. FM radios were popular among schools, houses, malls, taxis, jeepneys, etc., and disc jokeys were idolized as mysterious sweet-talking cool folks who could command a huge following. But then, when Bill Gates started making money out of his Windows, FM was suddenly driven out of spotlight, pushed to the edge of death by the more powerful and more convenient Mp3s. I have no idea if the younger generation of today would still find it worthwhile, as we once did, to listen to some newly-reformatted FM stations that dish out corny jokes, poorly-made songs and stupid contests.
The title of my entry has nothing to do with what I am thinking at this moment whatsoever. It just proves boredom's still tailing me.

I took a sick leave yesterday. I knew from the moment I woke up that it was one of those bad days. Besides, I wasn’t feeling well. I was struggling to get up and set up a working mood. It must have been caused by the bad weather that had given us a rough time the other day. I felt I was going to nurse a fever. Just “felt,” anyway. But I wasn’t feeling well yesterday, really (ows?). I said really! (ah, okay). You can think whatever you like (yeah, sure!). Asshole! (Bummer!). Except for a nice uninterrupted sleep, yesterday was such a bore. After watching Brothers Grimm and Dragon Tiger Gate (which made my headache even worse), there wasn’t anything more interesting to do. It freaked me out. I wanted to write a fiction, but then I wasn’t in a mood to do so. I also picked up my guitar and strummed some songs but it was kinda drab. I was almost at my wits end when I decided to try hitting the sack around 1pm. It’s crazy when you want to do something but can’t seem to find any interesting thing to do. What do people do when they feel like useless? Whoa, such a boooooring day...
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